by Dr Rahim Said
It was a sight to behold. At a cafe in an upscale shopping mall, a man with his bare right foot perched on a chair, his slippers in total disarray under a table meant for four, slouched slovenly, texting on his handphone, oblivious to his surroundings.
There were other customers at the restaurant, anxiously waiting for a seat but the gentleman hardly looked up from his phone. We are not sure whether he had a meal earlier because in front of him there was only an empty cup.
This behaviour, strange and unbecoming as it may seem, used to be a common sight in neighbourhood homegrown coffee shops where rickshaw or trishaw pullers frequented during the colonial period and even after Merdeka. They would sit on a stool, one shoeless leg raised up on its edge, sipping coffee from the saucer rather than the cup; a practice to cool down the hot beverage.
Anyway, it was a behaviour that gave rise to an expression among polite elders, trying to train their youngsters, “Don’t sit like a rickshaw/trishaw puller,” embarrassing them to comply with the expected customary practice.
I wished I could offer the same words of advice to this 21st-century rickshaw-like modern urban dweller in Kuala Lumpur that his behaviour is unpleasant, unhealthy, and rather disgusting.
Imagine the audacity. In an era where we pride ourselves on modernity, sophistication, and the polite etiquette of urban life, this man’s conduct was an affront to everyone around him. The cafe, usually a haven for socialising and relaxing, was reduced to an uncomfortable scene, where the sight of his bare foot and sprawled posture overshadowed the elegant ambience.
Have we regressed in our social etiquette to such an extent that public decency can be so blatantly disregarded?
The man, engrossed in his digital world, seemed completely indifferent to the physical one around him. It is a sad reflection on how some people prioritise their own comfort and convenience over basic respect for shared spaces.
The comparison to trishaw pullers of old is not made lightly. While their habits were born out of necessity and a simpler lifestyle, the modern equivalent has no such excuse. It is one thing to see a rickshaw puller, exhausted from laborious work, take a moment to rest with a shoe off and a saucer in hand. It is quite another to witness a man in a posh cafe, free of any immediate hardship, exhibit similar behaviour purely out of indifference or lack of consideration.
Perhaps it’s a sign of the times. The world we live in now, dominated by smartphones and personal screens, has made us less aware of the physical space we occupy and share with others.
Manners, once drilled into us by elders with a firm hand and a stern look, seem to have taken a backseat to convenience and self-absorption.
So, to the modern urban rickshaw puller: please, take a moment to look up from your phone. Notice the people around you, waiting patiently for a seat.
Consider the shared environment and the small acts of courtesy that make communal spaces pleasant for everyone. It’s not just about adhering to old-fashioned rules; it’s about showing a basic level of respect for those around you.
In the bustling city of Kuala Lumpur, where tradition meets modernity, let’s strive to uphold the best of both worlds. Let’s bring back a bit of that old-school politeness, even as we navigate the fast-paced, tech-driven lives we lead.
After all, a little bit of courtesy goes a long way in making our shared spaces enjoyable for all.
Dr. Rahim Said is a human behaviourist and regular contributor on digital media platforms. He is a professional management consultant, a corporate trainer and an executive coach specialising in coaching of senior executives and individual entrepreneurs with the purpose of modifying their behaviour in the pursuit of their cherished missions. (The views expressed by our columnist are entirely his own)
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