By Lydia Lee (Manager, Malaysian Programmes & Grants, World Vision Malaysia)
It is alarming to note that bullying affects 84% of children under 18 in some way or form, according to the Malaysia Crime Prevention Foundation. It comprised cyberbullying and, in some cases, physical violence that led to severe injuries and even death.
On average, there are daily reports of bullying. Zara Qairina’s case in Sabah sparked outrage nationwide.
Only parents, teachers, and students at schools can help stop bullying. Only action, not talk, by politicians can stop the bullying behaviour.
A bully causes pain, either through physical harm or hurtful words or behaviour, and does so repeatedly.
Bullying is an aggressive behaviour, and students are influenced by society through the mass media, movies and the community. The family must also play a vital role in cultivating courtesy and morality from an early age.
PREVENTION
Preventing and stopping bullying will create a safe environment where children can thrive, socially and academically.
Bullying can intimidate, force, shame, and promote powerlessness among the weaker students. Bullying has no respect for people.
The psychological roots of bullying are based on the desire to dominate and control someone, making the perpetrator (bully) feel more powerful.
In Malaysia, if Stop Bullying lessons are not taught in schools, the culture will continue to breed a generation lacking respect and compassion. If these new reforms as an additional syllabus are not implemented in the school system, bullying will continue and result in the degeneration of human values in society.
Recently, Malacca’s Yang di-Pertua Negeri Tun Mohd Ali Rustam said bullying not only harms the mental and emotional well-being of victims but could also lead to tragic consequences.
In line with His Majesty Sultan Ibrahim, King of Malaysia’s call for a comprehensive anti-bullying campaign, Mohd Ali proposed the introduction of an education and competition-based programme under the theme ‘Kesopanan dan Kesusilaan’ (Courtesy and Morality), the fifth principle of the Rukun Negara.
He said the programme should begin from primary school level up to universities and training centres, both public and private, to foster noble values among the younger generation.
“As Malaysians, the fifth principle of the Rukun Negara must truly be embraced and practised in daily life across all levels of society. Before doing something, we must ask ourselves whether it is courteous and moral. May Allah SWT bless our lives in this temporary world with good deeds and protect us from wrongdoings,” Mohd Ali said.
FOUR TYPES OF BULLYING
According to a United States NGO, Anthem Strong Families Experts group states there are four types of bullying: verbal, physical, social and cyber.
Verbal: Teasing, Inappropriate sexual comments, name-calling, threatening physical harm
Physical: Harassment, physical confrontation, degrading another person (can at times be sexual in nature)
Social: Spreading rumours, Purposely leaving someone out of an activity or group, Publicly embarrassing a person, Encouraging others to avoid a certain person or group
Cyber: Usage of digital devices like cell phones, computers, and tablets, Cyberbullying can occur through SMS, text, and apps, or online in social; gaming where people can view, participate in, or share content; sending, posting, or sharing negative, harmful, false, or mean content about someone else; sharing personal or private information about someone else causing embarrassment or humiliation. Some cyberbullying cases cross the line into unlawful or criminal behaviour.
SIX WAYS FOR PARENTS (AND TEACHERS) TO STOP BULLYING
UNICEF has proposed six ways for parents and teachers to keep their child safe, whether in-person or online.
1. Educate your children (students) about bullying
Once they know what bullying is, your children will be able to identify it more easily, whether it is happening to them or someone else.
2. Talk openly and frequently to your children (students)
The more you talk to your children about bullying, the more comfortable they will be telling you if they see or experience it. Check in with your children daily and ask about their time at school and their online activities, inquiring not only about their classes and activities but also about their feelings.
3. Help your child (student) be a positive role model
There are three parties involved in bullying: the victim, the perpetrator, and the bystander. Even if children are not victims of bullying, they can help prevent it by being inclusive, respectful, and kind to their peers. If they witness bullying, they can stand up for the victim, offer support, and/or question the bullying behaviour.
4. Help build your child’s self-confidence. Encourage your child to enrol in classes or join activities they love in your community. This will also help build confidence as well as a group of friends with shared interests.
5. Be a role model
Show your child how to treat other children and adults with kindness and respect by doing the same to the people around you, including speaking up when others are being mistreated. Children look to their parents as examples of how to behave, including what to post online.
6. Be part of their online experience
Familiarise yourself with the platforms your child uses, explain to your child how the online and offline worlds are connected, and warn them about the different risks they’ll face online.
Malaysians must work together to end the bullying culture by nipping it in the bud at home, in schools and in the community. The mass media can also play a constructive role in the government’s efforts to stop bullying attitudes among students.
(The views expressed here are entirely those of the writer)
WE